We’ve all heard of constructive criticism, constructive feedback, pro tip and sometimes abbreviated to CC. Whatever you call it, you have to be careful how you receive it, and even more delicate with how you serve it.
I was inspired to write this post because I see a problem more and more these days. People think they are giving constructive criticism when they aren’t being constructive at all. First, let’s look at what constructive criticism is and I’ll cover some bad habits I often see people do.
Some Definitions
Businesses Dictionary defines constructive criticism like this.
A recommended set of instructions that aims to collaboratively improve the overall quality of a product or service. Often containing helpful and specific suggestions for positive change, constructive criticism is highly focused on a particular issue or set of issues, as opposed to providing general feedback on the item or organization as a whole.
Dictionary.com defines Constructive as this.
Helping to improve; promoting further development or advancement (opposed to destructive)
One should be able to clearly see now that to be constructive in our feedback, it takes more than just giving our opinion. The feedback should come from a place of wanting to help improve and contain specific steps on how to achieve that.
Bad Habits on Giving Feedback
Ad hominem is by far the most destructive way someone can give criticism and in general, communicate with others. It’s when someone responds with criticism that includes a personal attack. It sounds like ”Only an idiot would do such a thing.”
Giving feedback without suggestions for improvement. ”I don’t think you’re doing a very good job.” ”That presentation couldn’t have gone worse.” ”This isn’t the quality I expect from someone at your level.” ”You should know better.” And maybe you should, but no one is a mind reader. All of these statements have one thing in common. THEY ARE EMPTY. It’s just criticism and it sounds like an empty opinion.
Useless sugar coating may seem harmless or even encouraging but it’s actually hurtful. And not just to the individual but also to the rest of the team. If you’re afraid of upsetting someone by giving them criticism you are rewarding the bad and allowing it to grow. If you tell someone, “You are doing a great job, just keep it up!” When in reality they should do better it sets a bad president. If you think they will improve naturally with time you are fooling yourself. People improve with clear feedback and steps toward improvement.
Motivation
It’s important to consider the reason you are giving feedback before you open your mouth. Ask yourself honestly, do you want to help this individual or do you want to give them a piece of your mind or your two cents? There’s a saying, opinions are like a**holes and everyone’s got one. You’ll get further in life keeping that to yourself.
Tone
Delivery is often everything. Consider the tone when you are giving someone feedback. If you haven’t you should check my post on humility. When you humbly offer feedback its much better received than from a place of ego. No one is impressed when you flex your know-it-all ego.
Being Appropriate
There is a time and a place for feedback and there’s also a pecking order. You should feel comfortable giving feedback to superiors but I would also caution to do it in private and with respect. I’ve given my leads feedback on many occasions and it has always been from a position of wanting to improve our working relationship.
Accepting Criticism
This can be the hardest sometimes. Especially when our ego gets in the way. It’s very important that in a professional work setting that you hold your composure, no matter how terrible the feedback maybe don’t bite back. The more professionally you carry yourself the more others will respect you. Moreover, try to see the good in others and try to take the feedback you get with a grain of salt.
I have received the most honest criticism from some of the biggest jerks. Sure they had bad delivery and they made me feel like crap. But I found the truth in what they said and used that to improve myself.
In Summary
All in all, this boils down to keeping respect for others. Both in giving and receiving feedback. And constructive criticism should always come from a motivation of wanting to help others be their best!
For more on this, there’s a great book that I highly recommend. It’s called Radical Candor. I picked up this book as I began my journey into leadership. But I realized as I read it that it actually applies quite a lot to being a good colleague. I wish I had it earlier on in my career.
